The Imaginary Interview - Part 1
WHEN DID YOU FORM ?
Officially on Wednesday 19th January 1994 - (but we were running as the R.A.T.S. 'unofficially' for 6 months prior to this) - during a crawl of Hereford town centre and used to return there on each anniversary up to 1997.
Anniversary Venues ...
1994 ... It's official ... we've formed as the R.A.T.S. - Hereford town Crawl
1995 ... 1st Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1996 ... 2nd Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1997 ... 3rd Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1998 ... 4th Anniversary - Ledbury crawl & a tour of the Ledbury Brewing Co.
1999 ... 5th Anniversary - Hereford again !
2000 ... 6th Anniversary - Bristol City centre crawl
2001 ... 7th Anniversary - 'Plough & Harrow' Monknash - 'Railway Inn' Upper Killay, Swansea
2002 ... 8th Anniversary - Pontyclun / Tyle Garw / Llantrisant local pubs
2003 ... 9th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' in Tyle Garw, Pontyclun
2004 ... 10th Anniversary - 'Miner's Arms', Whitecroft Lydney
2005 ... 11th Anniversary - 'White Hart' pub & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2006 ... 12th Anniversary - 'White Hart' & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2007 ... 13th Anniversary - 'White Hart' & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2008 ... 14th Anniversary - A 'crawl' of some of Birmingham's finest !
2009 ... 15th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' in Tyle Garw, Nr. Pontyclun
2010 ... 16th Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf', Llantrisant Old Town, Mid Glam. - (Tom Barlow)
2011 ... 17th Anniversary - 'Fagin's Ale & Chop House' - Glan y Llyn, Mid Glam.
2012 ... 18th Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf' in Llantrisant Old Town, Mid Glam.
2013 ... 19th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' - Tyle Garw - Pixie Spring / HopCraft brewery visit cancelled (snow)
2014 ... 20th Anniversary - 'City Arms' and 'Urban Tap House', Cardiff.
2015 ... 21st Anniversary - Gwynt y Ddraig Cider, Llantwit Fardre & 'Wheatsheaf Rooms', Llantrisant.
2016 ... 22nd Anniversary - A 'Crawl' around Bristol pubs (16th Jan)
2017 ... 23rd Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf Hotel', Llantrisant, for a record breaking 64 R.A.T.S. !
2018 ... 24th Anniversary - 'Llanover Arms' / 'Bunch of Grapes' / 'Otley Arms' - Pontypridd area, Mid Glam.
2019 ... 25th (Silver) Anniversary - 'Fox & Hounds' Llanharry, & the 'Pipeworks', Pontyclun. 55 R.A.T.S. attended
2020 ... 26th Anniversary - A 'Crawl' around several Cardiff pubs (18th Jan)
2021 ... 27th Anniversary - Cancelled owing to the Corona Virus pandemic !!
2022 ... 28th Anniversary - Cancelled owing to the Corona Virus pandemic !!
2023 ... 29th Anniversary - 'Coach Brew Pub' / 'Little Bar on the Bridge', Bridgend
2024 ... 30th (Pearl) Anniversary. The 'Coach Brew Pub' / 'Little Bar on the Bridge', Bridgend, 21 R.A.T.S. attended
WHY R.A.T.S. ?
Why not ?
It's as good a name as any and lets be honest now ... could you think of anything for A.A.R.D.V.A.R.K. or G.I.R.A.F.F.E. ? It's also easy to spell, and repeat, when we get lost after a 'few' pints, and we have been, on more than one occasion !
WHO NAMED THE SOCIETY ?
It was a JOINT effort by the six original people who were in Hereford that fateful day ! But, we have always looked upon Mike Peart as being the unofficial 'Chairman', (only 'cos he's older than us !), when he rolled his eyes skywards and uttered those immortal words "Shurely ... ( Hic ! ) ... we should form ... ( Brrrrrrp ! ) ... shum short of a ... ( Parp ! ) ... drinking shoshiety ? " To which several of us put our heads together, thought about it and announced in unison ... "Jeeeesus Mike, you bloody stink !"
WHO WERE THE 'ORIGINAL SIX' ?
MIKE ('Rat-Arse') PEART
Co-FOUNDER & CHIEF FARTER
Mike used to be a Team Leader at the Royal Mint - (where we all worked at the time of forming. Most of us took voluntary redundancy in 2002 / 03) - and he's more than willing to show you his testimonials, not a pretty sight by all accounts ! Why 'Rat-Arse' ? Because we're all convinced that there's a dead one up there, and from the stench emanating from his posterior, it's been up there for some time !!! This guy could FART for Wales !
KELVIN ('Zeb') WHITE
Co-FOUNDER
You know that Dr Who episode where the 'Angels of Death' statues move towards you if you blink ? Well 'Zeb' acquired the ability to do exactly the opposite. If you blink or look away for a second, he scatters his atoms to the four winds and disappears ! Excellent company when out with us, right up to the very moment he vanishes. Has a strong fetish for taxi rides and eats two spuds more than a pig - and the pig had better watch out too !
COLIN ('Caruso') ELLIOTT
Co-FOUNDER
A great guy who has tendencies to break into song ... unlike Mike who just breaks wind.
PAUL ('Swede') DOSTER
Co-FOUNDER.
Loves his Beer, Cider, and the 'Gee Gee's'.
DAVID E. JONES
Co-FOUNDER.
No, not me ... I'm the other one below ! Dave stopped attending for some reason during 1997-98 !!! (No ... he wasn't in jail). Started attending again in '99 ! He had to finish work due to a back injury/complaint and was medically retired from the Royal Mint in 2001. Sadly, only seen very rarely now ... and not for a Beer either !
DAVE (The Sec-RAT-ary) JONES
Co-FOUNDER, Sec-RAT-ary & 'JOKING' TREASURER
Title and job given to me for my ability to communicate with people and handle finances ... well, no ... not really, I was the only one with a computer & printer at the time, but I doo ave a gud nollidge ov spelin ! Unfit, fat, and just turned Seventy, is a very good description.
WHY 'JOKING' TREASURER ?
Because I do not handle subscriptions or membership fees - (there aren't any !) - only the money I collect for brewery visits, mini-bus fares, and meal deposits for our Social Evenings etc ... (Ha ! Remember those ???)
SO THERE'S NO 'MEMBERSHIP' FEE THEN ?
No, no fees whatsoever.
To become a R.A.T. you just turn up for 2 or 3 outings and prove you can behave yourself, and you're in ! The info I usually require is the 'basic' area of where you live - (i.e. not your home address) - your email address, with permission to send you info on Festivals and Days Out somewhere. There used to be a monthly newsletter, ('R.A.T. Tales'), but this ceased to be in 2014 after running for 13 years. All info is now up on the R.A.T.S. Google Calendar.
UPDATE : 2022, I started a very basic email newsletter, (the 'Brews Letter').
HOW DID PEOPLE KNOW WHERE YOU WERE GOING ?
Well, before we went online in 1998, I used to print out street maps / train times and all other relevant info, then mail it on to those who showed some interest on the previous occasion out. This was when I used to work at the Royal Mint.
HOW DOES A TYPICAL DAY START ?
If any rail travel took us from Cardiff Central, (and more often than not it did), we always tried to have a good breakfast to set us up for the day ... ( "Well at least until the train stops !" - Zeb ) ... and we used to, many moons ago, make our way to JOHN & KEN'S, "The Little Gourmet", in the Wyndham Arcade, Cardiff, sadly they're long, long gone as a cafe !
WHAT'S YOUR LARGEST ATTENDANCE NUMBER FOR AN EVENT ?
Our 15th Anniversary : 47 R.A.T.S. Supporters
Our 17th Anniversary : 50 R.A.T.S. Supporters
Our 23rd Anniversary : 64 R.A.T.S. Supporters
AND THE SMALLEST ?
Just me ... if you discount cancellations owing to inclement weather etc.
UPDATE : If you count the effects of the Covid pandemic, then our 27th & 28th Anniversary had 'ZERO' attendees, as they were cancelled !
HAVE YOU EVER HAD TROUBLE ON A DAY OUT ?
Yes, I'd be a liar to say otherwise ! We have a strict rule about it too. If a person causes trouble whether sober or by having 'one too many' - (under the affluence of (hic) incahol) - especially aggressive behaviour and extreme bad language, and it's "Bye Bye R.A.T.S." I'm afraid.
Since forming we have banned ...
3 x Visitors : for aggressive behaviour on a trip - (in the very early days of forming)
2 x R.A.T.S. : for aggressive & threatening behaviour / bad language / being right @rseholes. One of them held the record for joining & being banned in the shortest time !
We were going to bring in a choice of being ...
a) Banned - or
b) Being locked in a room with Mike, after he's had a curry (parp !) !
Everyone has voted to be banned for some strange reason !
ARE THERE FEMALE R.A.T.S. ?
Certainly. Our 1st Lady of the R.A.T.S. is none other than Mike's lovely wife, Olwen. She was voted in as such while we were on a long weekend away to Oostende in the 90's, and she's not backward in coming forward about trying different Real Ales. During the 'early years' on visits to the Bass / Hancock's brewery in Cardiff, we saw several women attending, and they thoroughly enjoyed themselves ... and why not ?
Officially on Wednesday 19th January 1994 - (but we were running as the R.A.T.S. 'unofficially' for 6 months prior to this) - during a crawl of Hereford town centre and used to return there on each anniversary up to 1997.
Anniversary Venues ...
1994 ... It's official ... we've formed as the R.A.T.S. - Hereford town Crawl
1995 ... 1st Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1996 ... 2nd Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1997 ... 3rd Anniversary - Hereford Town Crawl
1998 ... 4th Anniversary - Ledbury crawl & a tour of the Ledbury Brewing Co.
1999 ... 5th Anniversary - Hereford again !
2000 ... 6th Anniversary - Bristol City centre crawl
2001 ... 7th Anniversary - 'Plough & Harrow' Monknash - 'Railway Inn' Upper Killay, Swansea
2002 ... 8th Anniversary - Pontyclun / Tyle Garw / Llantrisant local pubs
2003 ... 9th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' in Tyle Garw, Pontyclun
2004 ... 10th Anniversary - 'Miner's Arms', Whitecroft Lydney
2005 ... 11th Anniversary - 'White Hart' pub & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2006 ... 12th Anniversary - 'White Hart' & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2007 ... 13th Anniversary - 'White Hart' & Coles Brewery - Llanddarog, Carms.
2008 ... 14th Anniversary - A 'crawl' of some of Birmingham's finest !
2009 ... 15th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' in Tyle Garw, Nr. Pontyclun
2010 ... 16th Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf', Llantrisant Old Town, Mid Glam. - (Tom Barlow)
2011 ... 17th Anniversary - 'Fagin's Ale & Chop House' - Glan y Llyn, Mid Glam.
2012 ... 18th Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf' in Llantrisant Old Town, Mid Glam.
2013 ... 19th Anniversary - 'Boar's Head' - Tyle Garw - Pixie Spring / HopCraft brewery visit cancelled (snow)
2014 ... 20th Anniversary - 'City Arms' and 'Urban Tap House', Cardiff.
2015 ... 21st Anniversary - Gwynt y Ddraig Cider, Llantwit Fardre & 'Wheatsheaf Rooms', Llantrisant.
2016 ... 22nd Anniversary - A 'Crawl' around Bristol pubs (16th Jan)
2017 ... 23rd Anniversary - 'Wheatsheaf Hotel', Llantrisant, for a record breaking 64 R.A.T.S. !
2018 ... 24th Anniversary - 'Llanover Arms' / 'Bunch of Grapes' / 'Otley Arms' - Pontypridd area, Mid Glam.
2019 ... 25th (Silver) Anniversary - 'Fox & Hounds' Llanharry, & the 'Pipeworks', Pontyclun. 55 R.A.T.S. attended
2020 ... 26th Anniversary - A 'Crawl' around several Cardiff pubs (18th Jan)
2021 ... 27th Anniversary - Cancelled owing to the Corona Virus pandemic !!
2022 ... 28th Anniversary - Cancelled owing to the Corona Virus pandemic !!
2023 ... 29th Anniversary - 'Coach Brew Pub' / 'Little Bar on the Bridge', Bridgend
2024 ... 30th (Pearl) Anniversary. The 'Coach Brew Pub' / 'Little Bar on the Bridge', Bridgend, 21 R.A.T.S. attended
WHY R.A.T.S. ?
Why not ?
It's as good a name as any and lets be honest now ... could you think of anything for A.A.R.D.V.A.R.K. or G.I.R.A.F.F.E. ? It's also easy to spell, and repeat, when we get lost after a 'few' pints, and we have been, on more than one occasion !
WHO NAMED THE SOCIETY ?
It was a JOINT effort by the six original people who were in Hereford that fateful day ! But, we have always looked upon Mike Peart as being the unofficial 'Chairman', (only 'cos he's older than us !), when he rolled his eyes skywards and uttered those immortal words "Shurely ... ( Hic ! ) ... we should form ... ( Brrrrrrp ! ) ... shum short of a ... ( Parp ! ) ... drinking shoshiety ? " To which several of us put our heads together, thought about it and announced in unison ... "Jeeeesus Mike, you bloody stink !"
WHO WERE THE 'ORIGINAL SIX' ?
MIKE ('Rat-Arse') PEART
Co-FOUNDER & CHIEF FARTER
Mike used to be a Team Leader at the Royal Mint - (where we all worked at the time of forming. Most of us took voluntary redundancy in 2002 / 03) - and he's more than willing to show you his testimonials, not a pretty sight by all accounts ! Why 'Rat-Arse' ? Because we're all convinced that there's a dead one up there, and from the stench emanating from his posterior, it's been up there for some time !!! This guy could FART for Wales !
KELVIN ('Zeb') WHITE
Co-FOUNDER
You know that Dr Who episode where the 'Angels of Death' statues move towards you if you blink ? Well 'Zeb' acquired the ability to do exactly the opposite. If you blink or look away for a second, he scatters his atoms to the four winds and disappears ! Excellent company when out with us, right up to the very moment he vanishes. Has a strong fetish for taxi rides and eats two spuds more than a pig - and the pig had better watch out too !
COLIN ('Caruso') ELLIOTT
Co-FOUNDER
A great guy who has tendencies to break into song ... unlike Mike who just breaks wind.
PAUL ('Swede') DOSTER
Co-FOUNDER.
Loves his Beer, Cider, and the 'Gee Gee's'.
DAVID E. JONES
Co-FOUNDER.
No, not me ... I'm the other one below ! Dave stopped attending for some reason during 1997-98 !!! (No ... he wasn't in jail). Started attending again in '99 ! He had to finish work due to a back injury/complaint and was medically retired from the Royal Mint in 2001. Sadly, only seen very rarely now ... and not for a Beer either !
DAVE (The Sec-RAT-ary) JONES
Co-FOUNDER, Sec-RAT-ary & 'JOKING' TREASURER
Title and job given to me for my ability to communicate with people and handle finances ... well, no ... not really, I was the only one with a computer & printer at the time, but I doo ave a gud nollidge ov spelin ! Unfit, fat, and just turned Seventy, is a very good description.
WHY 'JOKING' TREASURER ?
Because I do not handle subscriptions or membership fees - (there aren't any !) - only the money I collect for brewery visits, mini-bus fares, and meal deposits for our Social Evenings etc ... (Ha ! Remember those ???)
SO THERE'S NO 'MEMBERSHIP' FEE THEN ?
No, no fees whatsoever.
To become a R.A.T. you just turn up for 2 or 3 outings and prove you can behave yourself, and you're in ! The info I usually require is the 'basic' area of where you live - (i.e. not your home address) - your email address, with permission to send you info on Festivals and Days Out somewhere. There used to be a monthly newsletter, ('R.A.T. Tales'), but this ceased to be in 2014 after running for 13 years. All info is now up on the R.A.T.S. Google Calendar.
UPDATE : 2022, I started a very basic email newsletter, (the 'Brews Letter').
HOW DID PEOPLE KNOW WHERE YOU WERE GOING ?
Well, before we went online in 1998, I used to print out street maps / train times and all other relevant info, then mail it on to those who showed some interest on the previous occasion out. This was when I used to work at the Royal Mint.
HOW DOES A TYPICAL DAY START ?
If any rail travel took us from Cardiff Central, (and more often than not it did), we always tried to have a good breakfast to set us up for the day ... ( "Well at least until the train stops !" - Zeb ) ... and we used to, many moons ago, make our way to JOHN & KEN'S, "The Little Gourmet", in the Wyndham Arcade, Cardiff, sadly they're long, long gone as a cafe !
WHAT'S YOUR LARGEST ATTENDANCE NUMBER FOR AN EVENT ?
Our 15th Anniversary : 47 R.A.T.S. Supporters
Our 17th Anniversary : 50 R.A.T.S. Supporters
Our 23rd Anniversary : 64 R.A.T.S. Supporters
AND THE SMALLEST ?
Just me ... if you discount cancellations owing to inclement weather etc.
UPDATE : If you count the effects of the Covid pandemic, then our 27th & 28th Anniversary had 'ZERO' attendees, as they were cancelled !
HAVE YOU EVER HAD TROUBLE ON A DAY OUT ?
Yes, I'd be a liar to say otherwise ! We have a strict rule about it too. If a person causes trouble whether sober or by having 'one too many' - (under the affluence of (hic) incahol) - especially aggressive behaviour and extreme bad language, and it's "Bye Bye R.A.T.S." I'm afraid.
Since forming we have banned ...
3 x Visitors : for aggressive behaviour on a trip - (in the very early days of forming)
2 x R.A.T.S. : for aggressive & threatening behaviour / bad language / being right @rseholes. One of them held the record for joining & being banned in the shortest time !
We were going to bring in a choice of being ...
a) Banned - or
b) Being locked in a room with Mike, after he's had a curry (parp !) !
Everyone has voted to be banned for some strange reason !
ARE THERE FEMALE R.A.T.S. ?
Certainly. Our 1st Lady of the R.A.T.S. is none other than Mike's lovely wife, Olwen. She was voted in as such while we were on a long weekend away to Oostende in the 90's, and she's not backward in coming forward about trying different Real Ales. During the 'early years' on visits to the Bass / Hancock's brewery in Cardiff, we saw several women attending, and they thoroughly enjoyed themselves ... and why not ?
Part Two of ... The Imaginary Interview
